View Poll Results: What's your verdict?

Voters
13. You may not vote on this poll
  • Evolved

    1 7.69%
  • Extinct

    12 92.31%
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 44

Thread: Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (Bayona, 2018)

  1. #1

    Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (Bayona, 2018)

    Last 10 Movies Seen
    (90+ = canonical, 80-89 = brilliant, 70-79 = strongly recommended, 60-69 = good, 50-59 = mixed, 40-49 = below average with some good points, 30-39 = poor, 20-29 = bad, 10-19 = terrible, 0-9 = soul-crushingly inept in every way)

    Run
    (2020) 64
    The Whistlers
    (2019
    ) 55
    Pawn (2020) 62
    Matilda (1996) 37
    The Town that Dreaded Sundown
    (1976) 61
    Moby Dick (2011) 50

    Soul
    (2020) 64

    Heroic Duo
    (2003) 55
    A Moment of Romance (1990) 61
    As Tears Go By (1988) 65

    Stuff at Letterboxd
    Listening Habits at LastFM

  2. #2
    This was a movie. It had a start, a middle, and an end. It had some protagonists and antagonists. It had a score, and some acting, and the scenes were edited together using professional editing software. There were some special effects as well. It was directed by J.A Bayona. It will make money. We will be back in 2-3 years from now to do it all over again.
    Last 10 Movies Seen
    (90+ = canonical, 80-89 = brilliant, 70-79 = strongly recommended, 60-69 = good, 50-59 = mixed, 40-49 = below average with some good points, 30-39 = poor, 20-29 = bad, 10-19 = terrible, 0-9 = soul-crushingly inept in every way)

    Run
    (2020) 64
    The Whistlers
    (2019
    ) 55
    Pawn (2020) 62
    Matilda (1996) 37
    The Town that Dreaded Sundown
    (1976) 61
    Moby Dick (2011) 50

    Soul
    (2020) 64

    Heroic Duo
    (2003) 55
    A Moment of Romance (1990) 61
    As Tears Go By (1988) 65

    Stuff at Letterboxd
    Listening Habits at LastFM

  3. #3

  4. #4
    Replacing Luck Since 1984 Dukefrukem's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    37,786
    Quote Quoting transmogrifier (view post)
    This was a movie. It had a start, a middle, and an end. It had some protagonists and antagonists. It had a score, and some acting, and the scenes were edited together using professional editing software. There were some special effects as well. It was directed by J.A Bayona. It will make money. We will be back in 2-3 years from now to do it all over again.
    Best review ever.
    Twitch / Youtube / Film Diary

    Quote Quoting D_Davis (view post)
    Uwe Boll movies > all Marvel U movies
    Quote Quoting TGM (view post)
    I work in grocery. I have not gotten sick. My fellow employees have not gotten sick. If the virus were even remotely as contagious as its being presented as, why haven’t entire store staffs who come into contact with hundreds of people per day, thousands per week, all falling ill in mass nationwide?

  5. #5
    Moderator Dead & Messed Up's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    New Canaan, where to the shepherd come the sheep.
    Posts
    10,620
    Quote Quoting transmogrifier (view post)
    This was a movie. It had a start, a middle, and an end. It had some protagonists and antagonists. It had a score, and some acting, and the scenes were edited together using professional editing software. There were some special effects as well. It was directed by J.A Bayona. It will make money. We will be back in 2-3 years from now to do it all over again.
    Were there dinosaurs? Did the dinosaurs do things?

  6. #6
    Replacing Luck Since 1984 Dukefrukem's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    37,786
    Quote Quoting Dead & Messed Up (view post)
    Were there dinosaurs? Did the dinosaurs do things?
    Obviously as they were the protagonists and antagonists. Duh.
    Twitch / Youtube / Film Diary

    Quote Quoting D_Davis (view post)
    Uwe Boll movies > all Marvel U movies
    Quote Quoting TGM (view post)
    I work in grocery. I have not gotten sick. My fellow employees have not gotten sick. If the virus were even remotely as contagious as its being presented as, why haven’t entire store staffs who come into contact with hundreds of people per day, thousands per week, all falling ill in mass nationwide?

  7. #7
    Moderator Dead & Messed Up's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    New Canaan, where to the shepherd come the sheep.
    Posts
    10,620
    Quote Quoting Dukefrukem (view post)
    Obviously as they were the protagonists and antagonists. Duh.
    I see.

    I find Blue endearing as a protagonist because he is a dinosaur that has a blue stripe, like his name.

  8. #8
    Replacing Luck Since 1984 Dukefrukem's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    37,786
    Quote Quoting Dead & Messed Up (view post)
    I see.

    I find Blue endearing as a protagonist because he is a dinosaur that has a blue stripe, like his name.
    And you know he's a good guy because he helped Chris Pratt at the end of the first movie. So you know he'll remember him and save the day (again)!
    Twitch / Youtube / Film Diary

    Quote Quoting D_Davis (view post)
    Uwe Boll movies > all Marvel U movies
    Quote Quoting TGM (view post)
    I work in grocery. I have not gotten sick. My fellow employees have not gotten sick. If the virus were even remotely as contagious as its being presented as, why haven’t entire store staffs who come into contact with hundreds of people per day, thousands per week, all falling ill in mass nationwide?

  9. #9
    The Pan Spinal's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Portland
    Posts
    19,723
    Coming to America (Landis, 1988) **
    The Beach Bum (Korine, 2019) *1/2
    Us (Peele, 2019) ***1/2
    Fugue (Smoczynska, 2018) ***1/2
    Prisoners (Villeneuve, 2013) ***1/2
    Shadow (Zhang, 2018) ***
    Oslo, August 31st (J. Trier, 2011) ****
    Climax (Noé, 2018) **1/2
    Fighting With My Family (Merchant, 2019) **
    Upstream Color (Carruth, 2013) ***

  10. #10
    Evil mind, evil sword. Ivan Drago's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    6,995
    I know reviews are already calling this as dumb as the first JW, but I, for the life me, can't help but expect more fun than logic from a movie about dinosaurs getting brought back to life.

    That being said, some of the blurbs on Metacritic are referencing lines and moments from this movie that are somehow more cringe-worthy than anything in the first one...
    Last edited by Ivan Drago; 06-06-2018 at 09:25 PM.
    Last Five Films I've Seen (Out of 5)

    The Boy, The Mole, The Fox and the Horse (Mackesy, 2022) 4.5
    Puss In Boots: The Last Wish (Crawford, 2022) 4
    Confess, Fletch (Mottola, 2022) 3.5
    M3GAN (Johnstone, 2023) 3.5
    Turning Red (Shi, 2022) 4.5
    Tokyo Story (Ozu, 1953) 5

    615 Film
    Letterboxd

  11. #11

    Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (Bayona, 2018)

    JW > JW: FK because at least the former is super dumb in a “What were they thinking?” way and thus gives you something to talk about. This thing is super dumb in the most generic way possible; it literally has nothing new to add, and does so with as little verve or personality as possible.

    Do not get your hopes up about the “new” dinosaur. It does absolutely nothing that all other dinosaurs don’t do. Don’t get your hopes up about the new sidekicks - they might as well be named Cowardly Man and Brash Woman for all the character shading they get.

    This is a movie who posits a weaponized raptor that you target on someone by - get this - aiming a laser scope at them and pulling a trigger (well, pushing a button) to focus the raptor’s attention. That’s right, to kill someone by raptor, you basically have to do the exact same steps as you would do to kill them with a sniper rifle - but then wait for a giant living killing machine to do the honors instead and then pack that living killing machine up and take it home and feed it 20 goats or something. I mean... who writes this shit?

    That’s not to mention the TWO pointed closeups of Howard’s footwear near the start (“No heels! Hahaha we are so playful lol!”) and the two T-Rex deus ex machina..... this is a movie that exists but it has absolutely no creative impulses whatsoever. It is a massive step backwards for Bayona, whose A Monster’s Call was excellent, a beautifully sad fantasy.
    Last 10 Movies Seen
    (90+ = canonical, 80-89 = brilliant, 70-79 = strongly recommended, 60-69 = good, 50-59 = mixed, 40-49 = below average with some good points, 30-39 = poor, 20-29 = bad, 10-19 = terrible, 0-9 = soul-crushingly inept in every way)

    Run
    (2020) 64
    The Whistlers
    (2019
    ) 55
    Pawn (2020) 62
    Matilda (1996) 37
    The Town that Dreaded Sundown
    (1976) 61
    Moby Dick (2011) 50

    Soul
    (2020) 64

    Heroic Duo
    (2003) 55
    A Moment of Romance (1990) 61
    As Tears Go By (1988) 65

    Stuff at Letterboxd
    Listening Habits at LastFM

  12. #12
    Here till the end MadMan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    A land of corn and technology
    Posts
    20,076
    This looks baaad.
    BLOG

    And everybody wants to be special here
    They call your name out loud and clear
    Here comes a regular
    Call out your name
    Here comes a regular
    Am I the only one here today?



  13. #13
    Sunrise, Sunset Wryan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Charleston
    Posts
    6,363
    The Evil Dead II of Jurassic World movies. If we could somehow banish the first Jurassic World and put this in its place as the first JP sequel to return to screens, I'd have been way more satisfied. I liked this a helluva lot more than the first movie. It's shot incredibly well, has some wild, ridiculous, fun, chaotic set pieces, a very healthy sprinkling of dumb, some callbacks that are clever (and some not), a silly throwaway reveal about a character that goes nowhere unless they do something with it in the inevitable sequel and an ending that pretty genuinely changes the landscape for this series.

    Put simply, I thought this felt way more like an actual Jurassic Park movie than first JW. It gave me a touch of that feeling of watching the original. We've functionally trod this ground twice now, though, so whatever they plan to do for a third one if it's in the cards, it's gotta be different, which is why I liked the ending and am hopeful this provides a good springboard for the future.
    "How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home wine-making course and forgot how to drive?"

    --Homer

  14. #14
    Sunrise, Sunset Wryan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Charleston
    Posts
    6,363
    I thought of a good barometer for this movie.

    If you get to the scene where Pratt is flailing himself away from encroaching lava as his body parts increasingly wake up after being tranq-ed...and you sigh and roll your eyes, you might as well get up and leave the theater. But if you laugh at the silliness, I think you'll enjoy it.
    "How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home wine-making course and forgot how to drive?"

    --Homer

  15. #15
    Quote Quoting Wryan (view post)
    I thought of a good barometer for this movie.

    If you get to the scene where Pratt is flailing himself away from encroaching lava as his body parts increasingly wake up after being tranq-ed...and you sigh and roll your eyes, you might as well get up and leave the theater. But if you laugh at the silliness, I think you'll enjoy it.
    That + gyroscope + farewell to the Brachiosaurus are literally the only three things of any use in this film. I propose the following alternative: once they leave the island, bail - it is all severely downhill from there.

    Or better, watch something else that weekend.
    Last 10 Movies Seen
    (90+ = canonical, 80-89 = brilliant, 70-79 = strongly recommended, 60-69 = good, 50-59 = mixed, 40-49 = below average with some good points, 30-39 = poor, 20-29 = bad, 10-19 = terrible, 0-9 = soul-crushingly inept in every way)

    Run
    (2020) 64
    The Whistlers
    (2019
    ) 55
    Pawn (2020) 62
    Matilda (1996) 37
    The Town that Dreaded Sundown
    (1976) 61
    Moby Dick (2011) 50

    Soul
    (2020) 64

    Heroic Duo
    (2003) 55
    A Moment of Romance (1990) 61
    As Tears Go By (1988) 65

    Stuff at Letterboxd
    Listening Habits at LastFM

  16. #16
    Since 1929 Morris Schæffer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Belgium
    Posts
    11,030
    The Jurassic Park Franchise is a rather uneven beast which might explain why I liked this one more than any of the other sequels. It's definitely better than the previous one which felt like a retread, except now with a functioning park whereas this one actually feels like something different. And the ending really makes me look forward to the third World movie. A small sequence at the end with the Mosasaurus and some surfer dudes only hints at the mouthwatering shit that could potentially happen in the next one. I've resigned to the fact that the wonder is forever gone, but I'll be damned if this one wasn't thrilling, funny and even a little powerful. There are a couple of great shots. So yeah, I'm somewhat aligned with Wryan.
    [+] closer to next rating / [-] closer to previous rating

    • Dark (S3) ✦✦✦½ [-]
    • Fall (Mann, 2022) ✦✦✦½ [-]
    • Ms. Marvel (S1) ✦½ [+]
    • Dark (S2) ✦✦✦✦
    • Moon Knight (S1) ✦✦½ [-]
    • Get Carter (Hodges, 1971) ✦✦✦½ [+]
    • Prey (Trachtenberg, 2022) ✦✦✦ [-]
    • Black Bird (S1) ✦✦✦✦
    • Better Call Saul (S6) ✦✦✦½ [+]
    • Halo (S1) ✦✦✦ [-]
    • Slow Horses (S1) ✦✦✦½ [+]
    • H4Z4RD (Govaerts, 2022/BE) ✦✦½ [-]
    • Gangs of London (S1) ✦✦✦½ [+]
    • We Own This City (S1) ✦✦✦½ [+]
    • Thor: Love and Thunder (Waititi, 2022) ✦✦ [+]


  17. #17
    Moderator Dead & Messed Up's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    New Canaan, where to the shepherd come the sheep.
    Posts
    10,620
    Quote Quoting Wryan (view post)
    The Evil Dead II of Jurassic World movies.

  18. #18
    Winston* Classic Winston*'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Wellington
    Posts
    8,229
    Lots of real stupid stuff in here but I liked this significantly more than JW, mostly because JA Bayona is a much more competent director. There's some fun action-set pieces, a few interesting images and less cringeworthy dialogue (though still a lot of cringeworthy dialogue). Confused why they didn't take the opportunity to go full Cabin in the Woods with the climax, though.

    It amused me how little dinosaurs seem to be worth on the black market. For the price this movie cost to make, you could buy like 8 T-rexs.

  19. #19
    Administrator Ezee E's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Denver
    Posts
    30,597
    Passing.

    Barbarian - ***
    Bones and All - ***
    Tar - **


    twitter

  20. #20
    Moderator Dead & Messed Up's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    New Canaan, where to the shepherd come the sheep.
    Posts
    10,620
    This flick was a joyful bunch of nonsense.

    I'm stunned by how much I enjoyed its absurdity, its set-pieces, the way the film bifurcates between classic "lost world" escape tropes (that volcano is straight out of One Million B.C.) into a closed-doors series of suspense sequences. It hits that same spot for me that movies like The Mummy and Pacific Rim did, where the movie uses the stupidity of its premise as an excuse for cheerful humor, sudden violence, and a love for escalating action scenes from "difficult" to "impossible" to "how are they gonna come on now this is goddamn ridiculous." The flick's got a lot of cartoon attitude too, like when a tranqed-up hero has to roll away from lava, or when a dinosaur's sneer almost breaks the fourth wall. I love it. I'm in. The more Joe Dante these movies get, the better.

    Jurassic World to me was borderline detestable, so I'm sorta blown away that I had as much fun as I did.

  21. #21
    Moderator Dead & Messed Up's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    New Canaan, where to the shepherd come the sheep.
    Posts
    10,620
    Quote Quoting Wryan (view post)
    The Evil Dead II of Jurassic World movies. If we could somehow banish the first Jurassic World and put this in its place as the first JP sequel to return to screens, I'd have been way more satisfied. I liked this a helluva lot more than the first movie. It's shot incredibly well, has some wild, ridiculous, fun, chaotic set pieces, a very healthy sprinkling of dumb, some callbacks that are clever (and some not), a silly throwaway reveal about a character that goes nowhere unless they do something with it in the inevitable sequel and an ending that pretty genuinely changes the landscape for this series.

    Put simply, I thought this felt way more like an actual Jurassic Park movie than first JW. It gave me a touch of that feeling of watching the original. We've functionally trod this ground twice now, though, so whatever they plan to do for a third one if it's in the cards, it's gotta be different, which is why I liked the ending and am hopeful this provides a good springboard for the future.
    "You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Wryan again."

  22. #22
    Quote Quoting Dead & Messed Up (view post)
    "You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Wryan again."
    Save it for when he is right about something

    EDIT: Which he often is, just not in this case.
    Last edited by transmogrifier; 06-25-2018 at 01:11 AM.
    Last 10 Movies Seen
    (90+ = canonical, 80-89 = brilliant, 70-79 = strongly recommended, 60-69 = good, 50-59 = mixed, 40-49 = below average with some good points, 30-39 = poor, 20-29 = bad, 10-19 = terrible, 0-9 = soul-crushingly inept in every way)

    Run
    (2020) 64
    The Whistlers
    (2019
    ) 55
    Pawn (2020) 62
    Matilda (1996) 37
    The Town that Dreaded Sundown
    (1976) 61
    Moby Dick (2011) 50

    Soul
    (2020) 64

    Heroic Duo
    (2003) 55
    A Moment of Romance (1990) 61
    As Tears Go By (1988) 65

    Stuff at Letterboxd
    Listening Habits at LastFM

  23. #23
    Evil mind, evil sword. Ivan Drago's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    6,995
    The absurdly insane final five minutes are the lone bright spot in a narrative that's grasping at straws and takes itself super seriously about whether the dinosaurs should be perceived as animals or as experiments. . .but not once do the characters themselves ever ruminate about it, because they're not given an arc or progression to add any emotional weight to this story. And that's not even mentioning the cartoonish portrayal of characters representing both sides of the political aisle and the cringeworthy dialogue they were given in the script. But J.A. Bayona does a much better job at creating mood and atmosphere than Colin Trevorrow as a director, there's a one-take action sequence that's exciting, and the score is good. That's about all the credit I'll give it.
    Last Five Films I've Seen (Out of 5)

    The Boy, The Mole, The Fox and the Horse (Mackesy, 2022) 4.5
    Puss In Boots: The Last Wish (Crawford, 2022) 4
    Confess, Fletch (Mottola, 2022) 3.5
    M3GAN (Johnstone, 2023) 3.5
    Turning Red (Shi, 2022) 4.5
    Tokyo Story (Ozu, 1953) 5

    615 Film
    Letterboxd

  24. #24
    Replacing Luck Since 1984 Dukefrukem's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    37,786
    I dont understand the appeal of this movie. $150 opening weekend almost crosses the $1 billion mark after 9 days. I dont get it.
    Twitch / Youtube / Film Diary

    Quote Quoting D_Davis (view post)
    Uwe Boll movies > all Marvel U movies
    Quote Quoting TGM (view post)
    I work in grocery. I have not gotten sick. My fellow employees have not gotten sick. If the virus were even remotely as contagious as its being presented as, why haven’t entire store staffs who come into contact with hundreds of people per day, thousands per week, all falling ill in mass nationwide?

  25. #25
    Moderator TGM's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    3,819
    I'm assuming its the same people who went out to see the first Jurassic World 6+ times at the theater (no really, I even know some of these people) who are making up a lot of that.

    And yeah, I didn't understand it for that one, either. :\

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
An forum