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Thread: 10 Things I Learned

  1. #1
    U ZU MA KI Spun Lepton's Avatar
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    10 Things I Learned

    List ten things you've learned from the movies.

    There will be spoilers.

    10 Things I Learned from Maximum Overdrive


    1. You can kill a dog by driving a remote-controlled car into its mouth.

    2. Sentient trucks will rally around the one of them that has the most human-looking features.

    3. Soda pop machines are built with a mechanism in them that will fire the cans out like bullets.

    4. Steamrollers can snarl.

    5. If you need a missile launcher, ask your local truck stop owner/operator if they have one in their basement.

    6. Your Walkman can electrocute you.

    7. Trucks can see and track prey.

    8. Bible salesmen wear cheap shoes.

    9. Aliens have the technology to make machinery sentient.

    10. When the Russians say they have a "weather satellite," orbiting the globe, do NOT believe them.

  2. #2
    The Pan Spinal's Avatar
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    11. Stephen King should never be allowed to direct.
    Coming to America (Landis, 1988) **
    The Beach Bum (Korine, 2019) *1/2
    Us (Peele, 2019) ***1/2
    Fugue (Smoczynska, 2018) ***1/2
    Prisoners (Villeneuve, 2013) ***1/2
    Shadow (Zhang, 2018) ***
    Oslo, August 31st (J. Trier, 2011) ****
    Climax (Noé, 2018) **1/2
    Fighting With My Family (Merchant, 2019) **
    Upstream Color (Carruth, 2013) ***

  3. #3
    Crying Enthusiast Sven's Avatar
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    Quote Quoting Spinal (view post)
    11. Stephen King should never be allowed to direct.
    Seriously. At least Crichton was relatively competent behind the camera.

  4. #4


    1. Hot dogs get a bad rap.

    2. It's easy to confuse plastic trees for real ones.

    3. You can't out run the wind, but sometimes you gotta' try.

    4. Don't eye anyone's lemon drink. Ever.

    4. And while you're at it, don't trust hermits.

    5. Zooey Deschanel is attractive.

    7. Lawnmowers can be deadly.

    8. iPhones can really come in handy when you're dying to showcase the latest lion mauling.

    9. I can easily recognize M. Night Shyamalan's voice...

    10. Apparently, nobody cares about the bees.

  5. #5
    Administrator Ezee E's Avatar
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    We didn't have to see The Happening to know that Zooey was attractive.

    Kudos to the rest.

    And Mark Wahlberg doesn't want to kill anyone.

    Barbarian - ***
    Bones and All - ***
    Tar - **


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  6. #6
    Quote Quoting Ezee E (view post)
    We didn't have to see The Happening to know that Zooey was attractive.
    Well... yeah, that's true. Okay, amendment: it emphasized the fact that she was attractive?

  7. #7
    Director bac0n's Avatar
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    great idea for a thread

    [
    ]

  8. #8
    pushing too many pencils Rowland's Avatar
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    I've only seen half of Maximum Overdrive, but it was hilarious. You didn't mention the soundtrack, which sounds like it ripped off the strings from the Psycho shower scene of all things, repeated ad naseum as a soda machine lays waste to a softball field full of children with projectile bottle cans. And then the steam roller appears...
    Letterboxd rating scale:
    The Long Riders (Hill) ***
    Furious 7 (Wan) **½
    Hard Times (Hill) ****½
    Another 48 Hrs. (Hill) ***
    /48 Hrs./ (Hill) ***½
    The Extraordinary Adventures of Adèle Blanc-Sec (Besson) ***
    /Unknown/ (Collet-Serra) ***½
    Animal (Simmons) **

  9. #9
    Director bac0n's Avatar
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    10 Things I Learned From Resident Evil: Apocalypse



    1. Milla Jovovich's nipples are sharp enough to cut glass.

    2. Zombies can be killed in two ways: a shotgun blast to the head, or karate.

    3. It is possible to build an impregnable 30 foot high wall around a city the size of Minneapolis in less than 8 hours...

    4. ..yet it is impossible to keep a few zombies contained in a high security, top secret booby trap-laden, concrete reinfoced bunker many hundreds of feet underground.

    5. Churches put motorcycle jumps outside of stained glass windows.

    6. A zombie outbreak can be fun if you approach it with the right attitude.

    7. Lip-stick and stilettos - vital for your zombie-fighting wardrobe.

    8. Corporations can get away with dropping a nuke on a metropolitan area if they're big and multi-national enough.

    9. Running down the sides of buildings is cool.

    10. Those are two hours I'l never have back.

  10. #10
    Moderator Dead & Messed Up's Avatar
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    Quote Quoting Rowland (view post)
    I've only seen half of Maximum Overdrive, but it was hilarious. You didn't mention the soundtrack, which sounds like it ripped off the strings from the Psycho shower scene of all things, repeated ad naseum as a soda machine lays waste to a softball field full of children with projectile bottle cans. And then the steam roller appears...
    AC/DC's first and last soundtrack.

    :lol:

  11. #11
    U ZU MA KI Spun Lepton's Avatar
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    Six Things I Learned from Lucio Fulci's The Beyond (Only six because I'm killing the last few minutes of work and I won't have time for 10. )

    6. The world was sepia-toned in the 1930s.

    5. You can have carte blanche, but not a blank check.

    4. If your face is being eaten by spiders, the best thing to do is lay there and let them finish.

    3. Hospitals typically leave loose jars of acid sitting around for anybody to bump into.

    2. To load a revolver, push the bullets down the barrel.

    1. Hospital staff don't know how to spell the word "enter."

  12. #12
    One Thing I Learnt from Army of Shadows:

    1. Jean-Pierre Melville is fucking awesome.

  13. #13
    Quote Quoting transmogrifier (view post)
    One Thing I Learnt from Army of Shadows:

    1. Jean-Pierre Melville is fucking awesome.

    10 minutes later, he's still fucking awesome.........

  14. #14


    1. No one cares about Dodgson. Nor the fact that we have him here.
    2. Dr. Grant touched it.
    3. Babies smell.
    4. Yep, apparently they do move in herds.
    5. Hammond might have yelled "Grant!" or "Guns!" or some indecipherable guttural scream. We shall never know (actually, it's "Grant").
    6. For Dennis Nedry, polite formalities are essential.
    7. There is a fine line between "hacker" and "nerd".
    8. Nostalgic memories of a flea-circus can sometimes justify the construction of a disastrous, dangerous theme-park built around rampaging, man-eating dinosaurs.
    9. They have a T-Rex. [beat] They have a T-Rex.
    10. Sometimes holding onto your buttocks is of the utmost necessity. So says Sam Jackson.

    Note: Some of you may not get all of these unless you were like me and took full advantage of your Jurassic Park VHS back in the day.

  15. #15
    Moderator Dead & Messed Up's Avatar
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    Quote Quoting Amnesiac (view post)
    8. Nostalgic memories of a flea-circus can sometimes justify the construction of a disastrous, dangerous theme-park built around rampaging, man-eating dinosaurs.
    Rep.

  16. #16
    Quote Quoting Dead & Messed Up (view post)
    Rep.

    But none for the J-P Melville love. What have we wrought upon ourselves?

  17. #17
    sleepy soitgoes...'s Avatar
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    Quote Quoting transmogrifier (view post)
    But none for the J-P Melville love. What have we wrought upon ourselves?
    Uh...

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