I like Totino's Pizza Rolls. On occasion.Quote:
Originally Posted by megladon8
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I like Totino's Pizza Rolls. On occasion.Quote:
Originally Posted by megladon8
The pub across from my new house apparently provides free wi-fi for customers. I may not be ordering internet anytime soon.
How do I get out of jury duty without saying something racist?
be the next best thing, sexist.
Rent a college mascot and tell them you're a practicing fuzzy.Quote:
Originally Posted by Benny Profane
Walk into the room, point at another jury and say, "Guilty! He did it! God told me so in my prayers! Guilty guilty!"
I visited the church congregation I'll be attending once I move for the first time yesterday. I was meeting people and being friendly. My dad came with me and took the bishop aside to ask if he could help me find someone to marry.
So.
So much wrong I can't even begin.
That is one story. One. He's been here for almost two days.Quote:
Originally Posted by number8
I love my dad, but I am so emotionally exhausted by being around him. And he really has boundary issues. And he's really critical.
Some comedian had a good joke with this, "I'm not racist. I love niggers."Quote:
Originally Posted by Benny Profane
While my dad was off checking into his conference, I stopped by my sister's house and was unloading about my frustrations. (Half sister-- she's never met my dad.) I was quoting him with his accent intact, which for some reason my sister found hilarious. She could not stop giggling.
Anyway, she's meeting him for dinner tonight and she's concerned that she'll laugh every time he speaks. That would not go over well.
Side note: I'm always astonished how many people ask my father where he's from. He sounds so damn French it's like a caricature of French people. He sounds like the chef from The Little Mermaid. He even does that "hein?" thing.
Now if your Dad talked like the occasional French narrator on Sponge Bob Square Pants, that would be, like, the coolest thing EVAR.
classical french cuisine makes my loins quiver in excitement
It's pretty good. It's on my top ten of regional cuisines. But it's not first.Quote:
Originally Posted by Heidi
On a lighter note, after a particularly vicious game of gin rummy, my dad has given me the nickname Madame la Guillotine. I think that's awesome. I practically want to change my username now.
My dad was trying to find a wife for me at my sister's graduation. He offered me to someone. I wasn't even there.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mara
Our dads must never meet.Quote:
Originally Posted by Dead & Messed Up
Oh-HO. Snap, DaMU, you got served.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mara
DaMu and I are on the same team, here. The none-of-your-business-if-and-whom-I-marry team.Quote:
Originally Posted by number8
I like to salvage disses wherever I can.
There's one condo association we deal with who are so bigoted about the mentally ill. I just got off the phone with them and the woman kept calling our tenants "those people." Grrr.
She's refusing to issue our tenants visitor pool passes, which they are permitted to have as part of the lease, because "those people" wouldn't be able to "watch out for other people."
It's illegal to discriminate against people for medical disabilities, you know.
Ummm, call the ACLU?
I should. They're jerks.
recently moved, no internet or cable tv at my new home yet (posting from my job), it's like taking a short trip back in time... I even bought a magazine! something i haven't done in years.
For the first time in a million, I have the apartment to myself. My plan? Playing this neat tower defense game I got on XBOX Live + Wild Turkey.