Ah, the Kevin Smith defense.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurosawa Fan
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Ah, the Kevin Smith defense.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurosawa Fan
Happy Mother's Day, mothers! :cool:
I was on Facebook earlier, seeing all the updates for Mother's Day, and I decided to post a contrarian Facebook update, in which I said, "Screw Mother's Day" and elaborated on how it's a Hallmark holiday that enables bad mothers. Then I made some scrambled eggs, coffee, and pancakes (burnt on the outside, battery in the middle), secure in the knowledge that my mother doesn't frequent Facebook.
Exactly one hour later, I got a call from my mother. It's Mother's Day, makes sense.
"Hey mom!" I say.
"Hey...watcha doin'?"
"Oh, just made myself a big breakfast. How's the special day treating you?" I ask.
"What do I care?" she says. "It's just a - quote - hundred-year-old tradition co-opted by Hallmark."
I chuckle, because I've talked about this with her before (usually before I give her a present). But then dim laughter behind her voice piques my interest.
"Well, I love you mom, but it's true."
"Are you sure, Jim?"
"Where are you?"
"Oh" - and I hear real triumph in her voice - "I'm just visiting Omaha, and I happen to have your grandma and aunt on speaker-phone."
:lol:
DaMU's mom calls him before he can call her on Mother's Day. What a dick.
My dog caught a bird today. Okay, it was a pigeon, but still, kind of crazy. He was holding the bird in his mouth, and I wasn't sure what he was going to do. Neither did Marty.
I yelled out to him to let it go, and he did. What a peaceful dog.
Now he's barking at me to play more.
I didn't call my mother today.
It's such a stupid holiday.
at first i read it as "a penguin" and i'm like...:crazy::cry::cool::DQuote:
Originally Posted by Ezee E
I think I've broken my little toe, and I'm happy that I have a few painkillers left from last time I had a groin injury.
But I can't wear shoes, and if I have to spend $100 on a pair of sandals for work now, I'm going to throw a fit.
Can't they cut you some slack and let you wear like a pair od Rider sandals? I just bought a pair for 17€.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lasse
I got you a present.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v2...4988975236.jpg
got that for my father in law for christmas a few years back.
he hasn't spoken to me since. ;)
i quite like 'tyrannosaurus rex brain' and 'enough plutonium to make a bomb'. but with some of the others like 'quarter of the human immune system' and 'vol of bacteria living in your gut' it seems like they could've done better
Of course. I'll wear whatever I feel like, it was just that the stores where I work only had expensive Ecco sandals. Today I'm wearing my old flip-flops, and it's alright.Quote:
Originally Posted by [ETM]
I might have a house on Monday.
I MIGHT HAVE A HOUSE ON MONDAY.
Holy cats, I need to pack.
This is just perfect. I'm so happy! On Saturday I was in the city and my sister and I went up on Federal Hill to play with the cannons, and I was looking over the harbour and I said, "This is a beautiful city."
And then I realized, I do think it's a beautiful city. Somewhere in this whole mess I really got sold on Baltimore.
It has its... charm.
The connected area of Fed Hill, Inner Harbor and Harbor East/Canton is indeed nice and sometimes beautiful. But that's about 10-20% of the whole city.
Well, it's where I'm moving.Quote:
Originally Posted by Raiders
:lol:
The house is in Canton, near Fell's Point. A lovely neighborhood.
Facebook just suggested that I add two hot skanks in bikinis that are obviously fake accounts, because apparently my dumbass cousin is friends with them.
Long as you stay away from....haaaarm.Quote:
Originally Posted by number8
Wait...is that not what we're doing?
Do old people still have sex? Often?
I mean, assuming both partners' bits and pieces are still in working order. Do couples in their 60s and 70s still get bizz-ay?
I don't know, but I'm officially turned on.Quote:
Originally Posted by megladon8
Quote:
Originally Posted by megladon8
My Dad often warns my wife that she has a looooong sex life ahead of her.
My folks still enjoy a rather healthy sex life, my dad's 67, my mom's 64.
Not what I want to be thinking about this close to bedtime.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Scar
What's the warning for?
Shouldn't a wife, like, you know, enjoy having sex with her husband? That's part of marriage.
Its part of my dad's sense of humour.Quote:
Originally Posted by megladon8