That's one way to look at it. A rather naive way to look at itQuote:
Originally Posted by EyesWideOpen
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That's one way to look at it. A rather naive way to look at itQuote:
Originally Posted by EyesWideOpen
I mean I could only wear velcro shoes instead of ones with shoelaces on the off chance that someone would tie them together when I wasn't paying attention and cause me to trip but what kind of life would that be.Quote:
Originally Posted by Scar
Now you're just stretching. You don't need to turn your kid into hit girl, but teaching basic threat assessment / reaction is a good idea. Not only to escape kidnappings but also bullies and what not. Having a 'it won't happen to me or my kids' is a rather foolish position. But, hey, wear your pack however you want.Quote:
Originally Posted by EyesWideOpen
I'm don't have the data in front of me but I'm pretty sure that a nine-year old girl has a larger chance of being kidnapped than a grown man.
No shit.Quote:
Originally Posted by Winston*
Hey friends. Serious question:
What is your strategy for dealing with crippling anxiety? I'm not talking about in the long run. I mean in the present. Here. Now. That tight feeling in your chest/gut/head and everything you think about causes worry/rage/irritation/sorrow/exhaustion/fear. In other words, when you feel the weight of the world bearing down, what activities do you do? How do you attempt relief?
Asking for a friend.
Deep breaths. Go for a long walk.
Playing an instrument, even suckily, can be really helpful. Make a list of five things you can do today to feel less anxiety - the smaller and more concrete the better. It's hard to not feel good when you've planned to do something, however menial, and achieved it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sven
EDIT: What you're describing sounds closer to a panic attack or something. For that, do what Winston says.
Friend is stuck at work right now, but the walk home for him/her is nice and lengthy. I'm sure s/he's looking forward to it. I keep getting pinged with messages that panic is just around the bend, which isn't helping things, I'm sure.
Instrument is a good suggestion.
I know that feeling, Sven. To be blunt, it sucks. I started getting awful panic attacks a few years back, at a time in my life when I was doing very well professionally and personally. I had very little stress in my life. I went through a litany of tests because I refused to believe it was stress. But nothing out of the ordinary ever came up.
I know you said not for the long-term, but I have found an anti-depressant the works well. Again, at the time, I said to my doc, "But I'm not depressed!" Anti-depressants in higher dosages, at least the one I'm on, help with anxiety. I rarely get panic attacks anymore, but recently, on the way to an out-of-town airport, I felt like I was going to pass out--heart racing, throat tightening up, sweating, shaking, difficulty breathing--and I pulled over on the side of interstate twice. Finally got off on an exit, pulled into a Waffle House, got something to eat, talked to the wonderful employees who could tell I was in distress. Got back on the road and made my flight.
I sympathize with your friend. Terrible feeling.
This is for Mara.
Not because I think you have personality flaws to change, but because I know we share a love of John Cheese.
The Grand Theft Auto one from last month was also particularly brilliant, but figured you'd find that one less interesting. :)
Yes, I liked that one!
I s'pose I oughta chime in since it was I who let the cat out of the bag.Quote:
Originally Posted by EyesWideOpen
Yeah, maybe it may seem a little paranoid to have your kid hold a backpack a certain way, but I view it as a relatively trivial thing a kid can do to not expose him or herself to harm, the same way we teach kids not to speak to strangers. Do we want them to be afraid of people? No - we just want to give them some practical, easy to follow guidelines to they can keep themselves safe from harm.
I guess what it boils down to is this: I am well aware of the fact that one in every three women will be raped in her lifetime, with the bulk of those sexual assaults occurring when the girl is between the ages of 13 and 20. I consider giving my daughter the one-shoulder-backpack trick as another thing she can do to help avoid being one of those three.
Ehh... where do you live?Quote:
Originally Posted by bac0n
Still not great numbers but it's closer to 18% in America and that's women who have experienced either a rape or attempted rape... so not exactly 33% of women being raped.
And this risk is greater in low income areas and also during college and includes date rape. The odds of an attacker randomly raping your daughter at her age by grabbing her backpack and holding her down are asymptotic to zero.
Personally I would be more concerned with future back problems and anxiety issues. Definitely teach her to not wander off on or own and know where she is at night but this backpack thing doesn't seem like a very good idea to me.
I carried way too many books when I was younger and also did the one shoulder backpack thing and my back is not in great shape now.
Interesting but I highly doubt facebook will last that long.Quote:
Originally Posted by Irish
Interesting points, all, but I would counter with a few of my own. First, my daughter is nine. She is in the third grade. The contents of her backpack typically consist of the following: 1) her tennis shoes (tuesdays and thursdays, unless she's wearing them to school) 2) her homework folder (a cardstock folder with several sheets of paper) and 3) a folded up hoodie in case it's cold and she needs to put on an extra layer of clothing. Sometimes she'll slip a monster high doll in there to show her friends.Quote:
Originally Posted by Qrazy
On the other hand, people getting grabbed from behind has happened enough to get on the radar of someone who has been teaching self defense for decades and whom I trust as an expert on the matter, so if it's a numbers game you want to play, I would say the numbers favor risking back pain from carrying a 3 pound load on one arm (0% risk) over risking being put into a vulnerable position if attacked from behind (.01%).
But ya know what? It's a silly argument to have anyway, because as she gets older, and the backpack gets heavier, I fully expect my girl to get more mature and able to make decisions about her safety on her own, and furthermore, she'll be better able to defend herself too, so if she wants to go two shoulders at that point, more power to her.
And btw, I live in one of the nicer residential parts of Minneapolis, and yes, admittedly, the risk of her getting grabbed from behind with her backpack is very small.
:lol: Love that gif.
Ah, well if her backpack isn't heavy then fair enough.Quote:
Originally Posted by bac0n
The article fails to mention the wild card... messenger bags which is all I used in HS and College.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mara
Sports, the gym, P90X, Crossfit, running... any exercise.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sven
Hear ye, hear ye. His Lord Highness hath declared that clearing a printer jam shall from here on be known as "kicking out the jams."
You have to ignore, or counteract the "panic is just around the bend" messages. As soon as you start listening to them, they snowball into a panic avalanche and bury you (I know full well how difficult this is). But worrying that you're going to panic kind of becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. I still struggle with it. Just today I had to get up out of class and go pace in the hallway and try to get it together when I felt the adrenaline coming on. Terrifying. I've had a shitty week or two after a couple really good months. I'm hoping that if I keep challenging it, it will pass.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sven
But yeah, walking, deep breaths, calling someone that makes you feel safe. Those all work for me to varying extents. And like Hugh said, (prescribed) drugs can be really helpful, especially in conjunction with some form of therapy.
Did I kill random thoughts?
Yes.
I kid....