Uwe Boll [Archive]

Ivan Drago

04-07-2008, 04:41 PM

I signed it based on the simple fact that if Boll is that apathetic that he'd stop making movies just because a bunch of internet nerds got together and told him to, he's better off doing something else with his time.

Well...we all didn't take him seriously when he said he would literally fight his critics. He did.

balmakboor

04-07-2008, 05:09 PM

You know, I've still never seen a single Uwe Boll film. Is it worth it to watch one or two so I can decide whether or not to sign? Or should I just forget the whole thing and continue catching up on Tsui Hark?

Raiders

04-07-2008, 10:36 PM

This is a bump to show Dukefrukem why I deleted his thread.

Dukefrukem

04-07-2008, 10:36 PM

This is a bump to show Dukefrukem why I deleted his thread.

i suck

Dukefrukem

04-07-2008, 10:37 PM

lovejuice

04-07-2008, 10:48 PM

http://youtube.com/watch?v=hiLyBInXtYY

when is this released?

balmakboor

04-08-2008, 04:07 AM

http://youtube.com/watch?v=hiLyBInXtYY

That looked like a 9/11 film directed by Sergio Leone's retarded half-brother. I did watch it three times though.

MadMan

04-08-2008, 04:43 AM

I will never sign this.Same here, strangely enough. I've never seen any of his films and I probably never will, although I might give that medivial movie he made and Postal, which appears to be some sort of controversial and morally rehensible film and might end up being the the cult film of the year, a chance. Its just that I think that compared to say Michael Bay he's harmless. Now if there was an online petition to get Bay to stop making movies I would sign that.

SirNewt

04-09-2008, 07:54 AM

I can't help but feel a little excited for Postal. Sorry, I'm quite ashamed.

Sycophant

04-09-2008, 02:38 PM

"I'm not a fucking retard like Michael Bay or other people running around in the business or Eli Roth making the same shitty movies over and over again," says Boll. "If you really look at my movies you will see my real genius you know, and if you go on May 23 on Postal you will see that I deliver a movie what nobody else delivered in the last 10 years, what is way better as all that social critic George Clooney bullshit what you get every fucking weekend."

Pretty infallible, but if it's not clear yet, Boll clearly illustrates that you're at fault, not him. "You have to really wake up and you have to see me what I am," he says. "I am the only genius in the whole fucking business. Goodbye."

Link (http://kotaku.com/377605/uwe-boll-responds-to-million-man-petition-look-im-not-a-fucking-retard).

Qrazy

04-09-2008, 02:41 PM

I'm tempted to believe him based on pure strength of will alone.

Kurosawa Fan

04-09-2008, 02:44 PM

That's it. I'm watching one of his films. I feel like I owe it to him for all the shit I've talked. I should at least see this genius first hand.

Qrazy

04-09-2008, 03:02 PM

I kind of want to too... can we get some orderings from diehard fans of best to worst in terms of a hilarity factor?

SirNewt

04-09-2008, 04:11 PM

I kind of want to too... can we get some orderings from diehard fans of best to worst in terms of a hilarity factor?

Well, 'Postal' is actually carrying a somewhat positive vibe with people who've seen it. But if you want one that is already out you should see 'House of the Dead' for sure. BTW, don't confuse me for a fan. I just watched this interview (http://www.gametrailers.com/bonusround.php?ep=14&pt=1) and felt like I had to respect the guy a little. It seems like he has some pretty big stones. Anyway, the interviews a four parter so it's pretty long.

number8

04-09-2008, 04:44 PM

Postal's pretty great actually.

MadMan

04-09-2008, 05:09 PM

Sycophant

04-09-2008, 05:14 PM

I've never derided Boll's films because I haven't seen them, though I'm going to make a point of seeing Postal. I've only ever taken jabs at his public demeanor, which is laughable, but I think he's okay with that. Or he'll kick my ass one day.

Duncan

04-09-2008, 05:27 PM

I saw about half an hour of that one with Tara Reid. Insufferable. Not even unintentionally funny, but stupid enough to irritate.

balmakboor

04-09-2008, 05:42 PM

So, does Boll keep getting hired to direct because producers are afraid to not hire him?

balmakboor

04-09-2008, 05:44 PM

Folks I'm now convinced that Boll=Ed Wood Jr. No question. Just with bigger budgets. But the same talentless spirit flows through his veins. Bay is more like one of those idiot hacks who slummed for studios for a paycheck back in the old days.

I already called Richard Kelly the new Edward D. Wood, Jr. I don't know if the world is big enough for two of them.

D_Davis

04-09-2008, 05:56 PM

I kind of want to too... can we get some orderings from diehard fans of best to worst in terms of a hilarity factor?

House of the Dead is one of my all time favorites. I seriously thought about putting it on my top 100 simply because it is so bad and so much fun.

I love the film, and really not in any kind of ironic way.

It's got a ton of bad dialog, a stupid ass premise, boobies, blood, gore, and Clint Howard.

What's not to love?

number8

04-09-2008, 06:07 PM

Folks I'm now convinced that Boll=Ed Wood Jr. No question. Just with bigger budgets. But the same talentless spirit flows through his veins. Bay is more like one of those idiot hacks who slummed for studios for a paycheck back in the old days.

UB: And this is the thing, I am one of the only independent filmmakers who is doing studio movies independently with huge stars, with big budgets, in technical perfect quality. Perfect quality! And this is the point, Postal is not a cheap movie, everything in Postal, everything in Blackwood, everything in In The Name of the King is Hollywood A-list standard. I have the same crew of I, Robot. The same. Not similar crew, the same crew! Special effects and everything: in Fantastic Four and X-Men, I have the same people working on my movies.

But there is an internet wave, and you support this, which turns the truth into bullshit. And this is totally wrong. I'm not the new Ed Wood. Ed Wood died poor! And had no success. There's only that romantic term that Ed Wood was a genius because of the Johnny Depp movie, not because of Ed Wood. And this is the point, it's completely absurd, and the whole internet bashing is completely absurd and has nothing to do with my movies. And normally, journalists like you should see that and should write that. You can write, I didn't like Bloodrayne, I didn't like Alone In The Dark, I thought they were stupid, and bad acting, whatever, but if you write that the movies look like amateur trash movies, then you are lying on purpose.

http://blog.wired.com/games/2007/08/uwe-boll-interv.html

D_Davis

04-09-2008, 06:11 PM

He may be the most delusional director working today.

SirNewt

04-09-2008, 08:14 PM

So, does Boll keep getting hired to direct because producers are afraid to not hire him?

He keeps making films because he partially produces them himself. The source of his funding, however, is coming to an end.

"Despite a number of critical and commercial drubbings, Boll has been able to finance bigger budget films through German tax shelter funds. But "King" marked the last film to be bankrolled by his fund, which, like all similar tax shelters, has been banned in Germany."

LINK (http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=40961)

eternity

04-10-2008, 02:14 AM

I fucking love this man.

MadMan

04-10-2008, 04:55 AM

I already called Richard Kelly the new Edward D. Wood, Jr. I don't know if the world is big enough for two of them.Really. Hmm. I'll have to see some of Kelly's work. If I recall he's the guy who made Southerland Tales and of course Donnie Darko.

http://blog.wired.com/games/2007/08/uwe-boll-interv.html:lol: That's hilariously awesome. I stand corrected.

D_Davis

04-10-2008, 04:51 PM

Bay's response:

I find people who rant like that - calling shit about both me, and George Clooney - comes from someone screaming because he is not being heard. He is obviously a sad being.

When you ask "do I care"? Not in the slightest.

http://www.shootfortheedit.com/forum/showthread.php?p=24541#post245 41

Qrazy

04-10-2008, 05:35 PM

Bay vs. Boll boxing -- The final match up?

I'm surprised Boll doesn't like Bay actually, seems like his type of cinema.

Sycophant

04-10-2008, 05:40 PM

Bay vs. Boll boxing -- The final match up?

I'm surprised Boll doesn't like Bay actually, seems like his type of cinema.
What/who does Boll like? Beside himself?

Qrazy

04-10-2008, 06:04 PM

What/who does Boll like? Beside himself?

People that like him? The unrevised German legal system?

MadMan

04-10-2008, 07:04 PM

People that like him? The unrevised German legal system?The people who go to see his movies? His mother?

number8

04-10-2008, 11:31 PM

What/who does Boll like? Beside himself?

He's actually got the taste of your typical internet movie geek, really. Sometimes I think he regularly posts on RT.

megladon8

04-10-2008, 11:47 PM

I love how, in that print interview, Boll basically says that anyone who doesn't like his movies is automatically a "bad film reviewer" and a "Boll-basher".

Russ

04-10-2008, 11:49 PM

I love how, in that print interview, Boll basically says that anyone who doesn't like his movies is automatically a "bad film reviewer" and a "Boll-basher".
I believe the more appropriate term would be "Boll-buster."

:cool:

Spinal

04-10-2008, 11:57 PM

I love how, in that print interview, Boll basically says that anyone who doesn't like his movies is automatically a "bad film reviewer" and a "Boll-basher".

Well, that means pretty much everyone. His last film got 1 positive review out of 43 on Rotten Tomatoes.

And that one concludes with this sentence:
"He’s made an epic, of a sort, and if you see it with appropriately lowered expectations you might just walk out not hating it."

Qrazy

04-11-2008, 12:32 AM

Well, that means pretty much everyone. His last film got 1 positive review out of 43 on Rotten Tomatoes.

And that one concludes with this sentence:
"He’s made an epic, of a sort, and if you see it with appropriately lowered expectations you might just walk out not hating it."

His mother reviews films?

Barty

04-11-2008, 06:24 AM

http://youtube.com/watch?v=WWqCNmfJ1hY

http://youtube.com/watch?v=rsb-rSELaI0

:lol::lol::lol:

Rowland

04-11-2008, 06:34 AM

http://youtube.com/watch?v=WWqCNmfJ1hY

http://youtube.com/watch?v=rsb-rSELaI0

:lol::lol::lol:This man is amazing. Let him make movies!

Spinal

04-11-2008, 06:42 AM

I wonder if he used that kind of language with Ben Kingsley.

Rowland

04-11-2008, 06:47 AM

I'm still laughing about that second video ten minutes later... so fucking great.

Boner M

04-11-2008, 06:47 AM

"... social critic George Clooney bullshit wot comes out every fucking weekend..."

:lol:

Morris Schæffer

04-11-2008, 03:54 PM

A colleague of mine, who's a cool dude, but who isn't as cultivated as me when it comes to movies, came up to me and said "Hey, you know what movie is supposed to be really good? In the Name of the King!"

For some reason, and I'm really an incredibly friendly feller, the first words out of my mouth were "Fuck you." Albeit a more muted "fuck you."

I tried to atone for my unexpected act of verbal aggression by expounding on the catastrophe known as his Royal Bollness, but he looked at me with a dumbfounded expression.

MadMan

04-11-2008, 05:27 PM

He's actually got the taste of your typical internet movie geek, really. Sometimes I think he regularly posts on RT.Considering it is RT, I wouldn't be surprised.....

http://youtube.com/watch?v=WWqCNmfJ1hY

"I am the only genius in the whole fucking business." Does he really believe this bullshit? Heh.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=rsb-rSELaI0

:lol::lol::lol:"Don't use internet usernames. Use real names and your real address so I can track you down and rip you apart." God both of those videos were great. I now think I shall see some of his movies. For sure.

SirNewt

04-11-2008, 05:40 PM

http://youtube.com/watch?v=WWqCNmfJ1hY

http://youtube.com/watch?v=rsb-rSELaI0

:lol::lol::lol:

"I don't even know why you get off on me, eh, like crazy. . ."

Amazing, if you enjoy those check these out. (http://www.gametrailers.com/bonusround.php?ep=14&pt=1)

To see all four parts scroll and on the right you'll see them listed under episode 14.

Silencio

04-11-2008, 05:41 PM

"We are not able to make more as your mini-DVD videos at home with Ketchup and your little brother."

Poetry.

Qrazy

04-11-2008, 06:08 PM

"I don't even know why you get off on me, eh, like crazy. . ."

Amazing, if you enjoy those check these out. (http://www.gametrailers.com/bonusround.php?ep=14&pt=1)

To see all four parts scroll and on the right you'll see them listed under episode 14.

You know to be honest I kind of feel my respect for Uwe increasing... when I first heard the german tax loophole thing I thought what everyone was saying... here's a guy who's making bad movies to cash in... but now I think he is more in the vein of Ed Wood and genuinely loves making movies and playing videogames but just has no talent, still at least he's realizing his dreams.

I mean he sits across from that smarmy interviewer who probably hasn't seen many if any of his films and gives straight, reasonable answers to the questions, even when the interviewer is clearly being a dick... and I'm sure he's constantly putting up with this kind of hate from press, but still he can shrug it off... obviously he has a very over-inflated sense of self and the quality of his work but at least he's not judging an individual based on the quality of their work, poor or not, which is what most critics seem to be doing.

Sven

04-11-2008, 11:45 PM

To see all four parts scroll and on the right you'll see them listed under episode 14.

Man... that interviewer is terrible.

balmakboor

04-12-2008, 01:15 AM

I'm actually getting close to checking out my first Uwe Boll (Oova Bowl) film. Not quite there yet, but close.

SirNewt

04-12-2008, 01:36 AM

You know to be honest I kind of feel my respect for Uwe increasing... when I first heard the german tax loophole thing I thought what everyone was saying... here's a guy who's making bad movies to cash in... but now I think he is more in the vein of Ed Wood and genuinely loves making movies and playing videogames but just has no talent, still at least he's realizing his dreams.

I mean he sits across from that smarmy interviewer who probably hasn't seen many if any of his films and gives straight, reasonable answers to the questions, even when the interviewer is clearly being a dick... and I'm sure he's constantly putting up with this kind of hate from press, but still he can shrug it off... obviously he has a very over-inflated sense of self and the quality of his work but at least he's not judging an individual based on the quality of their work, poor or not, which is what most critics seem to be doing.

Ya, when I saw it my respect was increased a little. Of course that was before I saw the Youtube videos. He does a very good job in that interview of diffusing some of the questions Keley asks. I actually am glad he was a bit of a dick and asked some pretty hurtful questions. After all, a lot of us were wondering about those very things. I definitely want to see Postal now.

Qrazy

04-12-2008, 02:19 AM

Ya, when I saw it my respect was increased a little. Of course that was before I saw the Youtube videos. He does a very good job in that interview of diffusing some of the questions Keley asks. I actually am glad he was a bit of a dick and asked some pretty hurtful questions. After all, a lot of us were wondering about those very things. I definitely want to see Postal now.

Yeah well hard balling is one thing but he took every opportunity he could to side swipe him with underhanded comments... maybe the people who worked in the film rated it on imdb? Yikes.

Yxklyx

04-12-2008, 02:46 AM

I'm actually getting close to checking out my first Uwe Boll (Oova Bowl) film. Not quite there yet, but close.

All this renewed interest in the man's "work" has got me to move Heart of America (his highest rated film) to the top of my queue.

balmakboor

04-12-2008, 12:47 PM

All this renewed interest in the man's "work" has got me to move Heart of America (his highest rated film) to the top of my queue.

Highest rated? Forget that. I'm working my way up from the bottom. It looks like Alone in the Dark and House of the Dead are a good way to go.

My only real worry is the guy seems too mean spirited to be so bad he's endearing like Ed Wood. I imagine Boll's films are simply bad in a bad way. I'll never know I guess until I pop my cherry.

Ezee E

04-12-2008, 04:59 PM

Despite all the badness I rent from Netflix, I still refuse to rent Uwe Boll.

Rowland

04-12-2008, 06:29 PM

For House of the Dead, all you need to see is this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q72wbwbjpxQ).

Watashi

04-12-2008, 06:37 PM

For House of the Dead, all you need to see is this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q72wbwbjpxQ).
What the fuck happened at 3:19?

Sven

04-12-2008, 06:48 PM

For House of the Dead, all you need to see is this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q72wbwbjpxQ).

Man, that was so boring. It just went on and on.

Watashi

04-12-2008, 06:50 PM

Man, reading those comments makes my IQ drop.

Sven

04-12-2008, 06:53 PM

Man, reading those comments makes IQ drop.

fuck this movie should be shit house of the dead id rather watch the game then this movie. whats with the bullet time in this movie tryin to be like the matrix, & some of the zombies didnt even attack they just followd the survivers. & why have a movie & put clips of the game in it. this movie shit house & so is the 2nd house of the dead movie

:)

balmakboor

04-12-2008, 09:39 PM

For House of the Dead, all you need to see is this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q72wbwbjpxQ).

:eek: Oh my fucking god.

Qrazy

04-12-2008, 11:34 PM

:eek: Oh my fucking god.

That montage near the end was pretty surreal.

balmakboor

04-13-2008, 12:03 AM

That montage near the end was pretty surreal.

That's one way to put it. Seriously though, was that from the movie or was that clip altered by someone on the Internet? It was so unprofessional looking it would make a projector weep.

megladon8

04-13-2008, 12:11 AM

That's one way to put it. Seriously though, was that from the movie or was that clip altered by someone on the Internet? It was so unprofessional looking it would make a projector weep.

No, that's the movie.

It's amazing.

I've seen it like 5 or 6 times. It never gets old.

Who can possibly fault a movie with dialogue like this?

RUDY: You did all this to become immortal. Why?
CASTILLO: To live forever!

RUDY: It was at the back of my mind, digging at my subconscious.

Ezee E

04-13-2008, 12:20 AM

I couldn't finish the clip, it ran so long and boring. I can't believe someone would actually finish the actual movie.

megladon8

04-13-2008, 12:22 AM

I couldn't finish the clip, it ran so long and boring. I can't believe someone would actually finish the actual movie.

I feel bad for you.

The movie's a riot.

Sven

04-13-2008, 02:12 AM

I just signed the Pro-Boll petition. Will you? (http://www.petitiononline.com/uwelive/petition.html)

MacGuffin

04-13-2008, 03:02 AM

I just signed the Pro-Boll petition. Will you? (http://www.petitiononline.com/uwelive/petition.html)

Ah. I signed both just to stay balanced.

D_Davis

04-13-2008, 04:19 AM

Yeah, HotD is awesome.

I'm still searching for the isle of the dead, somewhere off the coast of Seattle.

Spinal

04-13-2008, 04:28 AM

I couldn't finish the clip, it ran so long and boring. I can't believe someone would actually finish the actual movie.

This was my reaction as well. I made it about three minutes.

Bosco B Thug

04-13-2008, 07:00 AM

Amazing, if you enjoy those check these out. (http://www.gametrailers.com/bonusround.php?ep=14&pt=1)

To see all four parts scroll and on the right you'll see them listed under episode 14. I only watched Part 1 and 4, couldn't get the other two to work, but aww. Mild Uwe is kind of endearing.

Rowland

04-14-2008, 04:03 AM

A defense of the good doctor. (http://www.nerve.com/CS/blogs/screengrab/archive/2008/04/11/yes-i-m-serious-paul-clark-defends-uwe-boll.aspx)

origami_mustache

04-14-2008, 04:16 AM

can I start a petition for this thread to go away?

Spinal

04-14-2008, 04:18 AM

can I start a petition for this thread to go away?

If you get one million signatures, I will delete this thread.

origami_mustache

04-14-2008, 04:21 AM

If you get one million signatures, I will delete this thread.

how about 5? Not even sure I could get that many.

SirNewt

04-14-2008, 05:02 AM

can I start a petition for this thread to go away?

Boll Buster

origami_mustache

04-14-2008, 07:53 AM

Boll Buster

Nah, I dont' have a problem with Boll. I've seen bits and pieces of House of the Dead, but I haven't seen any of his films in full. I don't think any filmmaker, no matter how much of a hack they may be, should quick their profession due to backlash; that just seems ridiculous and anti-American to me. haha

should I sign the pro-Boll petetion?

Qrazy

04-14-2008, 01:09 PM

Nah, I dont' have a problem with Boll. I've seen bits and pieces of House of the Dead, but I haven't seen any of his films in full. I don't think any filmmaker, no matter how much of a hack they may be, should quick their profession due to backlash; that just seems ridiculous and anti-American to me. haha

should I sign the pro-Boll petetion?

Seems pro-german though. ;)

origami_mustache

04-14-2008, 02:06 PM

enough of all this pinko talk.

McCarthyism ftw!

Scar

04-14-2008, 06:41 PM

I shut the clip off a few seconds into them shooting. Ugh, just ugh.

Yet, I still feel compelled to add it to me queue.

Russ

04-19-2008, 04:07 AM

According to IMDb, Dr. Boll has five new films :eek: being prepped for release at a theater near you!!

Herr doktor is a busy little beaver. Here's what you can look forward to:

Tunnel Rats (2008) post-production
Far Cry (2008) post-production
Sabotage 1943 (2009) in production
BloodRayne 3 (2009) in production
Zombie Massacre (2010) in production

I thought the German government had wised up and cracked down on all those tax loopholes that have contributed mightily to the Uwe Boll legacy.

At least he's not doing something really stupid, like producing a sequel to Alone in the Dark (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0913951/).

Doh!

Spinal

04-19-2008, 04:14 AM

BloodRayne 3 (2009) in production

He already made a sequel to this? :confused:

Kurosawa Fan

04-19-2008, 03:23 PM

Rowland

04-19-2008, 06:29 PM

Alone in the Dark was glorious, though if I hadn't been imagining Uwe shouting directions at the actors in his thick accent for most of the running time, I'm pretty sure it would have failed even as a "so bad it's good" b-movie.Honestly, I thought it was just boring. House of the Dead is consistently amusing in its ineptitude, but Alone in the Dark almost put me to sleep.

Kurosawa Fan

04-19-2008, 06:44 PM

Honestly, I thought it was just boring. House of the Dead is consistently amusing in its ineptitude, but Alone in the Dark almost put me to sleep.

Well, I watched it with a friend and beer. That might have influenced my opinion as well.

Rowland

04-19-2008, 06:45 PM

Well, I watched it with a friend and beer. That might have influenced my opinion as well.Those sound like ideal circumstances. Preferably several beers.

Scar

04-19-2008, 07:17 PM

Alone in the Dark was glorious, though if I hadn't been imagining Uwe shouting directions at the actors in his thick accent for most of the running time, I'm pretty sure it would have failed even as a "so bad it's good" b-movie.

I watched it with Spun, bac0n, and Big Jason. There wasn't enough booze in the world to make me enjoy that movie.

Dukefrukem

04-22-2008, 12:26 PM

ROFL! good!

Blizzard has essentially laughed the German director out of their offices, and certainly right out of Azeroth.

"We will not sell the movie rights, not to you... especially not to you," was apparently Paul Sams reply, to which Azeroth was pronounced saved!

"I got in contact with Paul Sams of Blizzard, and he said, 'We will not sell the movie rights..." Boll told MTV News.

To his own admission he goes on to to say "Because it's such a big online game success, maybe a bad movie would destroy that ongoing income, what the company has with it."

There you have it, not only juicy news of rejection from Blizzard to Uwe Boll but his own acceptance he would make a "bad movie". Just the one Uwe?

http://www.strategyinformer.com/news/865/uwe-boll-asks-blizzard-for-wow-movie-rights-azeroth-way-off-limits

ledfloyd

04-22-2008, 04:48 PM

At dinner on sunday my aunt said "I saw this movie with Jason Statham, DungeonSiege or something, one of the worst movies I've ever seen. I watched it in fast forward. I slowed down to pick up the dialogue but the battle scenes went on and on and on. It had Burt Reynolds and Ray Liotta and all these great actors but it was terrible."

I was trying not to laugh. For my aunt to call something terrible it had to be godawful. She loved Wild Hogs among others.

Morris Schæffer

04-27-2008, 11:26 AM

http://www.slashfilm.com/2008/04/25/uwe-boll-challenges-michael-bay-to-death-match/

Good lord!:)

Dukefrukem

05-13-2008, 11:22 PM

http://www.computerandvideogames.com/article.php?id=188885

"Grand Theft Auto would be super interesting for me, and I think I would actually be the right guy to do it," he said, adding, "because my movies are all bloody and violent and I don't have a problem with action scenes."

:pritch: